The kid with 6 Magikarps stayed home sick.
First panel may or may not be based on a personal real life incident involving discs and the visible frustration thereof.
Other suggestions were Doofus, Jerkwad and Ashley.
Fairy by heritage, hellspawn by choice.
Stones and words may break my birds, but bones can never hurt them.
http://www.rarecandytreatment.com/comics/1743829/awkward-boner/

Stones and words may break my birds, but bones can never hurt them.

http://www.rarecandytreatment.com/comics/1743829/awkward-boner/